Oh for fuck's sake, it's Valentine's Day again? Didn't we just do this?
I know, I know, I'm a bitter bitch because I don't like Valentine's Day. Yes, I'm some emo sad bastard because I don't get excited for doilies and roses and the stink of love and pheromones in the air. Yes, I'm some pinko commie liberal because I think Valentine's Day is a sham PR move by the chocolate/flower/greeting card industry to make money between Christmas and Mother's Day. "Can't you just enjoy it?" People coo at me.
No. No I can't. I'm sick of being single. I don't like it. I'm tired of my grandmother bugging me to bring somebody to a family function before she dies, for crying out loud. I'm tired of getting screwed on my taxes. I hate sitting and shivering on the couch by myself. Continue with the pity party ad nauseum.
This year, I'm not even going to worry about the pity party. Eldest made me a Valentine's Day card with a cute hand-drawn heart-shaped rose that I have out on my desk. My Mom got me a cute bracelet and a card. Tonight, I've got a hot date with my cool single friends, some Chinese food, and Ryan Seacrest that I'm really looking forward to. Then I think that I could still be in one of the crappy relationships I've had, I realize I'm better off on my own until someone genuinely good comes along. Plus, there's half-off candy to be had tomorrow, which I love.
Go die in a fire, Cupid. You won't get the best of me.