Monday, March 05, 2007

Vicodin, Take Me Away!

There is nothing worse on this earth than a hospital waiting room. Why should the patients have all the drugs? I'd have gladly taken some Vicodin off somebody's hands to take the edge off the sheer boredom and torture of sitting in a tiny room all day. There was one family with the girl who fancies herself a bombshell in the tradition of a Maxim model but is actually a very horsy girl in furry boots. There were many, many adults with fanny packs on. There was a doubly annoying combination of Mario Lopez and Kelly Ripa. Martha Stewart has a very fake gossip voice. Vicodin, please, take me away!

All this is to say, my Mom is fine was sleeping well when I left the hospital tonight. She was joking about her hair and my quest to find a hot doctor. (It's pointless. Every single hot doctor has already got a ring. My Mom's resident? Hot. Smokin' hot. And this is not some gold-digging, student-loan-paid-in-full rose-colored hot. He'd be hot even if he were a broke publisher. Hot.) I hope that she continues to be in a good mood tomorrow.

Thanks for all your kind thoughts. I promise I'll say something mean about somebody soon. Maybe the hot doctor's wife. Dang.

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