You've got to be fucking kidding.
The principal of the Saint Rose of Lima School banned talking at lunch after three students choked in the cafeteria.
Hold on. Wait. Back up. I don't think I can shut enough of my brain cells off to understand this kind of stupidity. None of the kids can talk because three morons can't figure out how to control the flow of food and air through their bodies? The snippet doesn't say what age group these kids are, but even if they're kindergarteners, they should have the basic body control to figure out HOW NOT TO CHOKE WHILE EATING if they're able to attend school. Also, it's absolutely the dumbest thing I've heard this week (including Bush's "I'm the boss of this family and what I say goes" comment) is the diocese's plan to try and regulate how the kids eat their food. And, strictly speaking, the real problem is that the kids have to breathe and eat at the same time. So really, the kids should be told not to breathe at all in the cafeteria while eating lunch. Perhaps the nuns should go around and cut the kids grapes in half and chop up their hot dogs too. God.
Sweet fancy Christ. That's the absolute dumbest thing I've heard all week. I fear getting old since the future of America can't even chew it's own food properly. How are they going to manage the blender to turn my food into mush I can gum?