Pass

I love how Australia turned down the United States' offer of aid after Cyclone Larry devastated Queensland.

"The president rang to express his concern about Cyclone Larry in north Queensland and to inquire about the extent of the damage," Mr Howard told reporters.

"[He] said that if there was any assistance we needed, the United States would be willing to provide it.

"Of course we are able, ourselves, to look after this.

"But it was a very generous, thoughtful gesture on his part and I thank him for it."

Awesome. "Listen, we don't want any of that ice you had crisscrossing the continent after you royally botched your own hurricane and your buddy Mike Brown down here mucking things up. Don't you still have thousands of people in your own country who don't have homes? Maybe you should take care of your own first? I'm just saying."

Perhaps Australia will be my new country of residence. I like warm weather, and koala bears are cute. Way to be, Australia. Take care of business your own selves.