Devil Went Down to Georgia...

But he pointed it out as Texas on the map.

Turns out Americans are stupid. Who'd have thunk it? Some of the frightening statistics:

• One-third of respondents couldn't pinpoint Louisiana on a map and 48 percent were unable to locate Mississippi.

• Fewer than three in 10 think it important to know the locations of countries in the news and just 14 percent believe speaking another language is a necessary skill.

Wow, man. How far up your ass does your head have to be to think it's remotely okay to not know where fucking Louisiana is? And have you been awake for this whole immigration/National Anthem debate? Second languages are a huge, huge issue in this country. I am not fluent in a second language, but I think it's important to teach people other languages. The girl I babysit is learning Chinese in the third grade. My school's curriculum wasn't so forward-thinking, but I did take three years of French. In Italy, my knowledge of French helped me decipher Italian. While I'm not sure how I feel about this whole immigration debate, I do think we need to understand that Americans are doing more business with the rest of the world, and we need to be willing to try to communicate with other countries on their terms.

• While the outsourcing of jobs to India has been a major U.S. business story, 47 percent could not find the Indian subcontinent on a map of Asia.

• Nearly three-quarters incorrectly named English as the most widely spoken native language.

• Six in 10 did not know the border between North and South Korea is the most heavily fortified in the world. Thirty percent thought the most heavily fortified border was between the United States and Mexico.

Wow. Just, wow. You can't find INDIA? Maybe we are too busy arguing morality in schools and sex ed and letting education fall by the wayside. I mean, I'm not perfect, but I can name most of the states and find goddamn India on a map. I weep for the future.